Reasons I am Awesome

I am a ninja.

My bones and organs are made of tungsten.

I can summon both fire and ice with my mind.

I found Carmen San Diego.

I can eat three hotdogs in thirty seconds.

I was the fifth Ninja Turtle.

When the full moon rises I turn into Gene Hackman.

My car is Kit from Night Rider.

During the eighties my alter ego was Bonnie Tyler.

I killed Skeletor.

I can ride a Kangaroo.

I designed the Flag for the United States of America.

I am a Highlander.

I played two years for the New England Patriots under the knickname Tom Brady.

I love pie.

I raced a CGI laser bike in TRON.

I fooled around with Rebecca Cunningham from Tailspin.

Sean Connery is my personal assistant.

I can lactate.

I own four tigers named: Lucky, Sparky, Mister T, and Deathbringer.

I beat up John Travolta.

I decorated my room in Dragon fur.